Archive for December, 2005

maapkan aku..

Thursday, December 29th, 2005

hurm..kepada semua orang yang hantar testi pelik2,

contohnye

1. sign tangan rock ker, smiley kotak2 ker, perkataan "cool" "cute" yg memakan ruang tu..

2. "hi dah makan?", "hi camne hari ni" n so on

3. mende2 yg boleh didapati dari fw msg contohnye cite kanak2 buta, reminder pasal cinte budak skola n benda2 yg sewaktu dengannya

4. lirik lagu

5.testi yg takde sebut ape2 pasal aku dan aku pon rasa tiada perkaitannya..

telah pon didelete satu masa lalu..aku pon x ingat laa..kesan marshmellow kot…ke sambal sotong malam tadi..tapi mmg dah takde pon..tgk la aku nye testi pon da berkurang..heheh..adela kira2 50+ dah delete

kalo da kene delete tu tak bermakne la aku x ske ke x syg korang….maapkan la aku..

gudbye 2005

Thursday, December 29th, 2005

today=30th disember 2005. the year coming to an end. hurm…i think this is the longest year in my life since i’ve spent most of the time in boarding school which means routine and more routine. let’s see what really happened

1. sumwhere in january aku dapat surat tawaran kemasukan ke sbp.aku baru balek dari skola,tgk kat dalam petisurat ade surat utk aku.haha.tak gembira pon. tapi bersyukur since that was what i wanted when i was in form1. tapi sekarang life aku mmg kat hillcrest. takpe2, surat tu aku simpan dalam beg….

three days later, ntah camne ayah aku gi bukak beg aku, sebab dia nak pinjam pen..yer2, seluruh keluarga bergembira..tapi, diorang pelik..ape tuh ‘integrasi’ and since when gombak ade sbp?? hahaha..mane la aku tau, aku pon tak penah dengar…sume siblings aku g sms..aku sorang je sangkut kat sbp’i’. time tu dah 21 januari tak silap aku..then mak aku pon arrange la jumpe doktor blablabla..aku pon follow je la..walaupon dalam hati aku kate "tanak…tanak!!"

25 januari aku still g skola..aku dok sorang2 kat tempat gajet scout tuh..hahahaha.(tanpa kebenaran cekgu rosdi) time tu aku tak pikir pon pasal hantu yg aku jumpe kat situ time form2..lantaklah..then hujan, pastuh ade pelangi..aku pon mulela berfalsafah kat diri sendiri "takpela,mula2 mmgla hujan(sedih) tapi lepas tu akan ade kegembiraan(pelangi)" words aku sendiri..mmg captured perfectly dalam kotak memori aku nih..

26 januari pegila skola..aku takkan lupe time aku nampak sarah liyana..aku cakap dalam hati "sape pengawas form2 nih..poyo semacam jer.."..hahahaha..rupe2nye tuh la pkp kitorang…org lain sume terkejutla sebab jr kasi salam kat sr (sekarang diorang da tak buat pon..hampeh)..aku tak terkejut sebab kat hillcrest pon diorang kasi salam gak..tapi pompuan pon kasi salam kat laki..laki pon kasi salam kat pompuan..heheh..

then mulela life aku sebagai seorang budak asrama..sengal.1st week tu belagak gile la..boleh bertahan kunun..tapi ade satu masa ni aimi buat perangai sengal dia pegi nyanyi lagu ‘oh ibu’..sume dak pompuan nangis..time tu dak laki takde..naseb baik….lepas tuh..badan aku mule naik sebab tak banyak exercise kot…seriously aku mmg dah bertukar kepada seekor badak lembab yg da tak boleh berlari cam dulu2..kiranya zaman kegemilangan aku dah berakhir..hahaha..tak kesahla…pastuh time hari sukan paling malang..aku demam..then aku kene masuk 800m kot..tapi time pertandingan tu aku kat dalam toilet ngan aimi..muntah!..sediy gile, teringat kat skola lame time aku masuk 600m dulu…sob3.

then aku jadik prefect..cam biasa la hidup aku ni asek2 prefect je tapi kat skola ni aku tak berminat sangat sebab bukannya ade cabaran..budak2 pon baik je…paling lawak bile budak2 bangi kate diorang dulu prefect takyah organize perhimpunan,atau majlis2 rasmi..teringat lagi zaman dulu2 time assembly..aku paling suke part pa system argh..hehe..tapi berat gile pa system selalu vijay ngan eka je angkat..aku men cucuk2..testing123..pastuh time form3 aku kene jaga file merit budak2 form5..argh,sume form5 aku kene jaga…susah2 gak..tapi oleh sebab itu, aku kenal ramai antara senior aku yg walaupon kepala mereng tapi banyak thoughts diorang yg aku pikir mmg bagus utk digunakan.

then aku jadi prefect lepas ujian2 bangang yg aku tak nampak pon rasional dia tuh..pastuh ade lagi interview utk majlis tertinggi..aku kate kat madam faridah aku tanakla jawatan2 besar tuh since aku pon tak cukup selesa ngan persekitaran skola tuh..tapi aku dapat jugak setiausaha..aku ni bukannye pekerja, oleh sebab itu banyakla kerja2 prefect tertangguh. sian aidil.

1st task persaraan pn aminah..form5 sume suruh buat bagus2 cam diorang buat utk hari guru(bende yg paling diorang banggekan)..dalam hati aku cakap "eleh, poio je..bukan best sangat..last hari guru aku time form3 kitorang sewa satu studio punye equipment utk buat live band performance…ko ape tau" hahahah..tapi buat jugak..aku ngan aswad jadi emcee…suara tak dengar..nak je aku santau satu dewan..time tu mmg banyak kerja aku ngan aswad..pastuh adela gossip2 bangang timbul..then lepas abis upacara tuh, aku dapat lak resit bunga dari kp suruh mintak duit prefect cover kos bunga tuh…aku simpan lagi resit tu tapi aku biar je..tak kutip pon..yg nak beli aidil ngan sheera..biarla diorang je settlekan..hahahaha..lagipon mae ade cakap kat aku "membazir je..mak aku tuh cekgu, dia kalau dapat bunga pon buang je bila dah layu". raja tanya aku "lawa ke tak"..aku cakap tak berbaloi..jadi pemimpin jgnla kikis harta rakyat,yer. wahahaha.

masuk bab ponteng memonteng..banyak kali gak..aku tido dalam dorm. time preparation day utk hari terbuka asrama aku dok dalam dorm ngan faridah settlekan kitorang nye bintang2 dan utk mengelakkan kene tangkap, kitorang nyorok bawah katil kak imah..kenapa katil kak imah?? yer..soalan yg baik..jawapan: kak imah sidai baju kurung ngan jubah2 dia sampai tak nampak langsung kaki katil..wahaha..pastuh time diorang dah naik,aku ngan faridah sergah diorang..mmg tahan gelak je time bawah katil tuh..setan punye budak2 dorm ngumpat kitorang tak tolong..hahahhaa..

then ade satu hari ni lepas re-orientation form4, balek tu ade ceramah ape erk? aku dah lupe..sebab aku tak pegi..aku,aimi,fatin,sayha,faridah lepak kat bilik bace aras makmur..sume bantai shorts time tuh..keskeskes..kitorang pon borak2,lepak2,gelak2(kene cover sket takut kantoi)..then bila kitorang dengar grill dah kene bukak, kitorang pindah makmur 5..tepat2 time sheera depan dorm, kitorang on lampu dorm..dia pon terkejut la..hahahah..

lepas seminggu buli sheera ngan perkataan. dia pon da tak tahan kot. kitorang kene panggil pn fauziah. small matter. dah settle pon. dia siap tuduh aku bawak henpon lagi. tak bla. aku mengaku sume kesalahan kecuali pasal henpon tuh. tak buat tak mengakula. aku skema la,mane ade bawak phone cam korang! :p time pengarah sbp datang wat round pon aku ponteng gak..tempat rahsia..heheh..

kat integomb aku selalu demam..kekadang pura2 demam pon ade..tapi kalau ramai org demam..sure aku demam sekali.x cukop vitamin la nih. aimi la paling baik ngan aku..ingat time dia amik air dari water cooler utk tuam aku. pastuh bawakkan aku ubat..sob3..mane korang nak carik member camtu??

petang2 aku selalu gi jogging ngan member aku la sape lagi kalo tak aimi,fatin,ngan sayha..time mula2 masuk skola dulu aku selalu men volleyball ngan budak2 form2..tapi diorang kerek..tak best..bila aku masuk kelas lepas main (padang ngan kelas dekat je..otw g kelas leh arr ushar aspura, diorang ni pemalas tukar bedsheet), sure diorang tanye "ei aki,ko g mane haa..sampai berpeluh2.." aku pon katela ngan accent yg pekat.."riadhoh la..kate time riadah takkan nak bace buku kot"hahaha..sian howra ngan nina..

assembly=aku penah tertido sambil berdiri..sungguh memalukan..nama aku pon ade 3 kali kene sebut kat perhimpunan.1st time pelantikan prefect, 2nd sebab pakai inai, 3rd sebab tak buat public speaking..ahahhaha..moooomaaalaaa..then, lepas buat public speaking dia puji2 aku..haha,kasi line aku bangge sket "hey,u was very good…where did u get the idea to do that??..but anyway u’re really good..nice job girl..nice job"..hahaha..then aku dapat hadiah harry potter nye novel..owh,maknenye 4 kali la kene sebut kat assembly..time tu aku blur je sebab aku tak tau pon tuh pertandingan (adeke org diwajibkan masuk petandingan???)

dahla tuh, cukupla sampai sini je…btw, cekgu saedah selalu sebut2 pasal org yg tak kenal dia tuh..budak tu adalah aku ngan ***.hahahaha..mati kau lah, bajet famez..bukan penah berduet ngan siti nurhaliza ke, strumming ngan oag ke..banyak belagak pulak..tahun ni walaupon paling panjang aku rase, tapi paling sket aku dapat lessons of life…hidup aku pon tak dapat melihat dunia luar..aku dah lost aku nye sense of humour, respect kat org lain dan banyak lagi good quality yg dah fade..aku pon dah tak dapat menulis dgn baik cam dulu2..even time bahas pon aku selalu sangkut..ntah apela jadik kat aku…tapi aku dapat rase otak aku makin lampi dan beku..hahahah..takpela..taun depan ade lagi kan??

aku amik kesempatan ni nak ucapkan time kasih banyak2 kat sume org..aimi sebab jadi kawan aku yg paling baik, sebab jeleskan aku time ko rapat ngan seha..mae sebab jadi first kawan aku kat integombodo tuh…husna ngan fatin yg selalu teman aku pedajal org..sayha yg buat hati aku kecewa time ko rapat ngan aimi..hahahaha..cekgu2 yg mengajar..dan tak kurang juga yg menyusahkan idup aku dengan hwerk2 yg mmg aku takkan buat..terutama sekali pn rabiatul yg tak perasan aku tak hantar semua folio bi..aidil sebab tahan je ngan perangai aku dan still member ngan aku walaupon kene gosip kuat dulu2..raja sebab nasihat aku,aimi,fatin..sheera sebab sediakan kasut utk dibuang dalam tong sampah surau(wahahahaha)..banyaknyer..aku kate nak stop tadi..aku ni penipu ke hape nih..dah arghh..bye!

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Tuesday, December 27th, 2005

tired. homwerk sux. since aku tak abiskan lagi folio kimia:bahan buatan dalam industri, aku kenala work extra utk cuti nih..yeah,padan muke aku..

i scare myself easily lately..the shadow of my hand from my lamp made it look like a cat ran across my floor…and i do not own one! i scream like hell that time..hahaha..one more thing, there’s one emoticon that’ll surely scare me.. raja’s favourite. dammit. i’ve seen the real one twice..maybe thrice but the last time it wasn’t really clear. come on, let’s go hunting so i won’t be so bloody coward.

so, when i couldn’t push myself to anymore homwerk thingy..i update this thing

What’s so good: family. talking for hours with my fav pal. im . digital photography. artwork. drawing. my own guitar. xbox. making sandcastle.  my own schedule. coffee. lots of comics. fast computer. fishballs. my music. aimi. husna. faridah. fatin. raja. jon! my bro(sumtimes), daniel, spongebob. imagination. retarded birds(chicken,flamingo n ducks..as long as it doesnt fly) , cats!! , latenight movies. hoodies. carwash machine. live football match(watching not playing..haha) , hairwax, earwax euww..haha . enormous headphone. barley. letter from a friend not pn. durasni. massages. big hug. yong tow foo. camping. suprising people. making wishes when its 11:11 or 12:34 like when i was 4. a lot more i don’t remember…

What’s no good: liars. drama mamas. cigarettes. rain sometimes.traffic light. ungratefulness. cockiness. the cost of living on long island. loneliness. rapists. racists. heterosexists. sexists. gas prices. neighbours (mase diorang tgh karaoke). alarm clock. plain hot water. homwerk.

buat je lah..

Monday, December 26th, 2005

1. Who are you?

2. Are we friends?

3. When and how did we meet?

4. Do you have a crush on me?

5. Would you kiss me?

6. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.

7. Describe me in one word.

8. What was your first impression?

9. Do you still think that way about me now?

10. What reminds you of me?

11. If you could give me anything what would it be?

12. How well do you know me?

13. When’s the last time you saw me?

14. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn’t?

15. Are you going to put this on your blog and see what I say about you?

____________________________________________________________________

well, this one is longer..even more question..but if u do drop in to my blog accidentally just do it…plz plz..yeah now i started to beg like a dog.

Whatever, this will be a good ego-shot..hahha

1. Who are you?

2. Are we friends?

3. When and how did we meet?

4. How have I affected you?

5. What do you think of me?

6. What’s the fondest memory you have of me?

7. How long do you think we will be friends?

8. Do you love me?

9. Do you have a crush on me?

10. Would you kiss me?

11. Would you hug me?

12. Physically, what stands out?

13. Emotionally, what stands out?

14. Do you wish I was cooler?

15. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I?

16. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.

17. Am I loveable?

18. How long have you known me?

19. Describe me in one word.

20. What was your first impression?

21. Do you still think that way about me now?

22. What do you think my weakness is?

24. Do you know what makes me happy?

25. Do you know what makes me sad?

26. What reminds you of me?

27. If you could give me anything what would it be?

28. How well do you know me?

29. When’s the last time you saw me?

30. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn’t?

31. Do you think I could kill someone?

32. Have we ever kissed?

33. Do you miss me?

34. Do you think i miss you?

33. Are you going to put this on your blog and see what I say about you?

Friday, December 23rd, 2005

susahnye jadi pompuan..kalo dah suke pon takleh cakap…

kalo jadi laki bulehle main hit n run..lol..

bosannyergh..

i am me.

Thursday, December 22nd, 2005

u see.what’s the point of writing when none gonna read it? hahaha

today, i had a big conversation with hakim

yeah, he told me to be a ‘gurl’.(that’s how they spell it out right??)

so, today i’ve a confession to make. i am a girl since 1989. last time i checked, im quite sure im still a girl. i have no problem with my period cycle. the problem is guys out there, one thing i should tell u. never judge a book by its cover(selalu dengar rite?? kenapa takleh simpan dalam kepala dan gunakannya?) its up to me to be what i am. i dont care. those of u who just can’t stop labelling. go.suck.ur.own.dick. i can understand that u got nothing better to do. i am suggesting that u should write a journal or do something better. guys assume all girl to be ‘ayu’, lemah-lembut, sopan-santun, rajin, and the list go on. sooner or later u’ll open ur eyes and mind,insyaAllah..only then u know what’s lifes all about!

i can stand label. what i cannot stand is  people who ask me to be what i’m not. i am me. i can’t be what i’m not. i rather be hated for who i am than being loved by faking. get it? if im bothering u, im sorry. its not like i went make ur life upside down or something. u just can’t stand looking at me, so just turn ur head to the different side, and if ur eyes still catch my shadow, go buy some shades or be one of the ‘kassim selamat’.

whatever la..aku takde mood la pulak nak sambung. g mati lah.

hahaha..

Wednesday, December 21st, 2005

.wheee.dah lame dah aku tak tulis blog kan kan??

ntah nape aku rase energetic gile..tapi since takde ape nak tulis,aku wat la mende ni

name : nur ain zakiah
hobbies : internet, shopping
gender : female
hair color : black
horoscope : cancer
hair : super straight
eye color : dark
hand : right
status : :D
siblings : five.
bedtime : 3 am
car : hot wheels mirra ngan anis kasi time bday :)
dob : 1st july 1989
location : kuala lumpur
school : sbp integrasi gombak
weakness : vanilla ice-cream n pizza
fear : Allah
missed memory : solat jemaah kat Integomb. Abang Munzir jadi imam.
height : 5′2
weight : 45kg

rasenye sape yg bace mmg takde keje..thanks anyway..sekarang korang dah leh score penuh kalo ade test pasal aku..yeahh..bye!

Saturday, December 17th, 2005

fatin…

aku tau kau takkan bace mende ni.ko mane ade acc frenster..eheh..mane ko pegi hah setan. banyak kali aku call kau. tak tau ke aku risau..dahla dgn condition kau tuh..dah bape banyak kali aku melepet kat cm tunggu kau…yerla2,tu kan fav hangout ko..ko nak suruh aku pegi wat poster org hilang pastuh tampal kat kedai mamak ujung cm tuh ke? kalo yer pon nak blah taun depan jgnler ignore member..

dah aku tulis blog ni nampak cam aku tak pentingkan member2 lain lak…tapi aku nak sape2 yg bace ni pahamla tahap kebimbangan aku nih dah meningkat dari hari ke hari..sob3…fatin sengalla..kalo ko angkat phone,mesti aku ajak ko tinggal ngan aku.kita leh g gath 4IN sesame..gig2 banyak pulak time cuti nih, dah aku kene g sorang..lol…rtw pon takleh g ngan kau..manela kau pegi

mp3 aku pulak selalu nak mendajal aku…bile lagu radiohead-creep kuar mestila banyak2 kali aku teringat kat kau..ni aku nak kasi tau satu mender..ko bukan creep/weirdo seperti yg kau fikirkan…poetic tragedy buat aku rase cam nak g selongkar seluruh kedah…seperti yg telah kita persetujui,ko ngan aku mmgla takde chemistry tapi ko yg kate kita kene stick together…time aku tgh tulis mende bodo nih, aku terdengar lagu used-listening…faveret band kau..

aku nak cakap satu mende ni je last…kalo ko nak cakap ape2..even if im not there and ur mouth was full with candy that u can hardly talk,I’M LISTENING!!!

.how beautiful life was when u share it with a friend u cherish.

game over!

Saturday, December 17th, 2005

I guess you are reading this so you can learn about me. Well im antisocial I harldy ever talk to people. Making a friend is really hard for me cause then i get really clingy and i dont want them to leave me. And some who I thought was friend will go labelling,backstabbing and copycating. I have lost so many people in my short life that i have givin up on people. Trees are the only friends that wont ever leave me. So yeah im a tree hugger. But sooner or later they’ll die eventually.sighh

A friend once said that i was like a candybar, i was nice and sweet on the outside but nuts in the inside. But most of the people I know who later be my close friend told me..Outside, I was cold n harsh but it was different inside.  Alot of shit has happened to me (yeah,macamla org lain tak kene kan? hahah) . But if i could travel through time and change the past i would probably change nothing cause the past made me what i am today.

I hate labels but i can stand people labeling me because they got nothing better to do but when a person sees you like from a mile away and starts screamin at the top of there lungs ” look at the goth, punk, emo kid!!!” and then comes running torwards you just so they can stare and ask silly questions like if you were a circus freak, thats is when it starts getting anoying.

Im a very very very nice person and because i am so nice people tend to walk all over me. havent you ever heard that frase ”nice boys finish last” well it is true. Nice people never get any breaks, that is why there isnt that many nice people in this world.

I have alot of hobbies. I like to read alot and play video games. When i was a kid they would stop me from doin bad stuff. Everytime somthing bad happened in my life i would pick up a book or a nintendo controller and automaticly i would be sent to another world where those problems would dissapear.

At this moment in my life i find myself in alot of crossroads. I dont know what i should do with my life. But I want to do everything I can posibly do because life is short. So dont waste your life in talking about what your are gonna do just go out and do it becuase there is no do-overs, no repeats, no second chances or restart button there is only game over. . .

thank you

Wednesday, December 14th, 2005

how beautiful life was..i’m free…i would love to say thanks to mum for giving me the chances to experience life since she gave birth to me. and letting me talking for hours about my thoughts and she never stop listening. thanks to dad for the sperm, and the money. for always ziarah-ing me at integomb every weekend without fail. thanks to my parents for almost everything, the love, care, nagging…but then, they wouldn’t be around if Allah took them early..then i realised that He’s the one i would really have to thank..for blessing me with a family…though it might look disfunctional outside.. for giving the air for breath. the green scenery that makes my heart warm. my heart beat. my soul. my hand to type. all my senses. my frens to cherish. my din-that let me discover my innerside without questioning things that i shouldn’t. for my brain that let me score for my exam eventhough i hate to study. there’s too much to thank…i’m blessed…..how beautiful life is…

:))