sakibakidaki

i went to genting yesterday. saw ustaz sahli and one pelakon yg tak terkenal at starbucks..yg jadi irfan cerita natasha tuh. i manage to show him the "Loser" sign. hahha.. i hate genting cuz too much ca-ya-nun-alip. fuck racism but that’s me.

i couldn’t sleep last night so i went down to see what’s left with my xbox. no luck there either. so i went up again and do some add math exercise pn. che gayah’s had left for me. then i decided to play the guitar and my mind’s all fucked up so i have to download some stupid tabs from the internet which doesn’t sound so good. not knowing at what time i dozed off, wake up this morning and saw a scratch at my  arms. i looked at the damn guitar. 3rd string dah putus!. hidup mmg menyusahkan aku. baru je 2 hari lepas ganti 2nd string. now i have to go back to the damn place to get  a new string again. sekarang aku nak buat hal taknak mandi pulak. everytime air kene scratch tadi pedih gile. kalau aku bubuh sabun lagi la tambah kepedihannya. leher aku pon sakit sebab tido rata2..

hidup ini mmg gembira. aku la salah seorang penggembira itu. bagus bagus.

that’s all about yesterday

i pray to Allah that today won’t be as fucked up as yesterday.*grin*

hari ini

kurenung ke luar jendela

pandanganku tembus dibalik gunung

kosong…

kosong itu indah

benarkah?

persoalan tiada jawapan

apa yang aku meraban?

dalam riuh rendah

aku sedar sebenarnya aku sendiri

dulu, sekarang dan mungkin akan datang…

aku pelikla sebenarnya…walaupun dah 16 tahun lebih aku hidup dalam dunia Allah ni, aku masih lagi teraba-raba carik diri sendiri. mungkinkah semua orang pun begitu? ketenangan hati ni pun hanya pinjaman sementara sewaktu aku sujud. aku nak ketenangan hati yg immortal… aku tanak jadi salah seorang dari crowd yg worship budaya barat. tapi usaha aku untuk jadi Melayu Islam sangatla sukarnya… aku nak sangat mendalami makrifat Allah tapi tengoklah diri aku mmg tak layak pon…but im not going to do nothing with that.. senjata mukmin aku harap sentiasa ada bekal aku kemana-mana…kalimah syahadah biarlah tertanam dalam jiwa,insyaAllah.

hey heyo..im home again for the chinese new year..cny sucks with a lot of homwerk which is a total burden for me..madam faridah told us to bring back whatever folio we’ve done last year which is neither in school or home because i never do whatever english homwerk..and a ‘YAY’ for me shall we? shall we??

yeah, i’ve been whining alot which is not good mentally. i told myself early this year to "take orders.stop rebelling’ but there’s really one thing i should be pissed off about is pn siti asma..erghhh…haven’t i told u before about pn.rahimah’s voice that seems like lullaby driving me to sleep?? and biology is only interesting when we have to operate the katak malang and dump the body in jon’s pubcup..ahahaha..

the relationship between us (the form 5 student) is getting stroger..we’ve supper together last night…and our guys can’t stop making the ‘wheeee…wheee’ sound which i think is inherited from hosni. we have good foods this year.(alhamdulillah). and i cant stop gaining weight now that my whole family is calling me ‘ainfat’. huhuhu. too bad too bad.

surely there’s tons of homwerk to finish. im going to finish it real soon (maybe in three days of ignoring people and patience). then my life’s going to start again. =)) aten said i should learn to prioritise n that’s what i’ll do..insyaAllah..sudoku drive me insane cuz i just cant stop doing it..one after another until midnite.

i am envying raff’s guitar..when first i saw him handling those masterpiece and the word fender captured my eyes,i was like..’whoaaaaa’. its all about the aura..heheh. that night, during solat hajat, i pray for a fender..trok gile perangai akuh..hohoho

i don’t know what the juniors are thinking about..one of them whose name sounded somthing like ‘kemek’ and his friend fayez told me to sing a song from soad when they saw the damn patches at my bag. "akak zakiah, nyanyi sket lagu aerials…cam tau je ape tuh system of a down" . i said "kau nyanyi lagu ibanla, muke kau cam iban"..hahaha…kids! reminder for the remainder…diorang tu baru dengar soad dari abang2 form5 jer dah nak worship sgt artis barat..

well, for the time being, i’ve retired from the skodeng club since mae caught me red handed..ahahha..later

THE KEYS TO YOUR HEART

well, another quiz i guess..i dont know what the hell it got to do with animals cuz the question is all about animal and this is what they came out as a result..

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you’re told that you’re loved.

You’d like to your lover to think you are flexible and ready for anything!

You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.

Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything… no secrets.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage.

In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You’ll do anything for love, but you won’t fall for it easily.

i’m down with the foo fighters this week. when they first formed, i was pretty unwilling to believe that grohl could top what he did with nirvana. it just seemed insulting. and to be honest, the first few albums were nothing that struck me as something i’d go out and buy. but right now i’m digging one of their current singles and it occurs to me that they haven’t just successfully outdone nirvana, but i would happily admit they’ve written most of the best rock music of the last 5 years. the car grief seems to keep getting worse. i am filled with screams. and i’ve opened my email just now. there’s already three upcoming event and i’m really sorry i won’t bother to think of anything right now either than my slipping grades.hahaha..now that i should hate myself for making myself sound like a freaky nerd..hope u guys have fun without me, fuck urself when u get boring or go get some oyster sauce to top your salad.

hey, i did this damn quiz sumone sent it to me. but its too bad that friendster blog doesn’t support html script. if it does i still haven’t figure out how. and i’ve lost a long review of rock the world 6(takes me 20minutes to write that and it just vanished like that, it’s quite dissapointing!) but i wrote another one anyway to put it in my english homwerk(which i havent passed up yet)..and yeah about the quiz, why dont u guys check it out at http://quizfarm.com/test.php?q_id=987 i scored 88% for rebel and lonely. guess i am a loner. get used to it anyway.

last week was a tough one. school has started again and its my final year and i’ll be sitting for SPM in november. my dormmate was a little shock with my new haircut. and so do fatin..n mae too..i am grateful with my short hair. easy to take care. no more rigid routine like applying extra moisturisers at the end of my hair to prevent the strand breaking. i don’t miss my dinner anymore.*Happy!!* i wash my hair daily nowadays. smells geeewwwdddd..owh, there’s lots of people asking why i cut those damn hair. i still remember the day when i get it cut, i called my mom thrice only in one hour. she never allow me to have short hair since i was 4 because i get really naughty and hyper with short hair. since then she decided to not cut my hair shorter than my shoulder level. and because i always get it trimmed at least once a fortnight, it grew really fast that it can cover my whole back. but now the long hair is gone. i have to admit i was pretty sad at first but yeah i dont have too much time to do this and that. what’s good is i can wear half-scarf without worrying the hair dangling around..ahaha..lots of air for the hair.*yay!*

the sports day is coming and surely we’ll have lots of things to do. gonna be real bz again but i think the nilam girls relationship is getting better from day to day. we had our meeting held last night which last until about 1. it ended when fatin told that she had a full bladder and can’t stand a second more. bengong. school’s lots of fun i think. keon’s our batch leader.*applause*. and i am more comfortable with hosni than before.*alhamdulillah* we had our blazer.finally. and i hate the skirt because its too big that it doesn’t stay in my waist but my ass instead. and the top had a baggy lengan which i think double my size. but who care im going to wear it anyway. but not with baju kurung for sure even if aidil tell us to do so. and i get rid of the f words already.

hurm..kepada semua orang yang hantar testi pelik2,

contohnye

1. sign tangan rock ker, smiley kotak2 ker, perkataan "cool" "cute" yg memakan ruang tu..

2. "hi dah makan?", "hi camne hari ni" n so on

3. mende2 yg boleh didapati dari fw msg contohnye cite kanak2 buta, reminder pasal cinte budak skola n benda2 yg sewaktu dengannya

4. lirik lagu

5.testi yg takde sebut ape2 pasal aku dan aku pon rasa tiada perkaitannya..

telah pon didelete satu masa lalu..aku pon x ingat laa..kesan marshmellow kot…ke sambal sotong malam tadi..tapi mmg dah takde pon..tgk la aku nye testi pon da berkurang..heheh..adela kira2 50+ dah delete

kalo da kene delete tu tak bermakne la aku x ske ke x syg korang….maapkan la aku..

today=30th disember 2005. the year coming to an end. hurm…i think this is the longest year in my life since i’ve spent most of the time in boarding school which means routine and more routine. let’s see what really happened

1. sumwhere in january aku dapat surat tawaran kemasukan ke sbp.aku baru balek dari skola,tgk kat dalam petisurat ade surat utk aku.haha.tak gembira pon. tapi bersyukur since that was what i wanted when i was in form1. tapi sekarang life aku mmg kat hillcrest. takpe2, surat tu aku simpan dalam beg….

three days later, ntah camne ayah aku gi bukak beg aku, sebab dia nak pinjam pen..yer2, seluruh keluarga bergembira..tapi, diorang pelik..ape tuh ‘integrasi’ and since when gombak ade sbp?? hahaha..mane la aku tau, aku pon tak penah dengar…sume siblings aku g sms..aku sorang je sangkut kat sbp’i’. time tu dah 21 januari tak silap aku..then mak aku pon arrange la jumpe doktor blablabla..aku pon follow je la..walaupon dalam hati aku kate "tanak…tanak!!"

25 januari aku still g skola..aku dok sorang2 kat tempat gajet scout tuh..hahahaha.(tanpa kebenaran cekgu rosdi) time tu aku tak pikir pon pasal hantu yg aku jumpe kat situ time form2..lantaklah..then hujan, pastuh ade pelangi..aku pon mulela berfalsafah kat diri sendiri "takpela,mula2 mmgla hujan(sedih) tapi lepas tu akan ade kegembiraan(pelangi)" words aku sendiri..mmg captured perfectly dalam kotak memori aku nih..

26 januari pegila skola..aku takkan lupe time aku nampak sarah liyana..aku cakap dalam hati "sape pengawas form2 nih..poyo semacam jer.."..hahahaha..rupe2nye tuh la pkp kitorang…org lain sume terkejutla sebab jr kasi salam kat sr (sekarang diorang da tak buat pon..hampeh)..aku tak terkejut sebab kat hillcrest pon diorang kasi salam gak..tapi pompuan pon kasi salam kat laki..laki pon kasi salam kat pompuan..heheh..

then mulela life aku sebagai seorang budak asrama..sengal.1st week tu belagak gile la..boleh bertahan kunun..tapi ade satu masa ni aimi buat perangai sengal dia pegi nyanyi lagu ‘oh ibu’..sume dak pompuan nangis..time tu dak laki takde..naseb baik….lepas tuh..badan aku mule naik sebab tak banyak exercise kot…seriously aku mmg dah bertukar kepada seekor badak lembab yg da tak boleh berlari cam dulu2..kiranya zaman kegemilangan aku dah berakhir..hahaha..tak kesahla…pastuh time hari sukan paling malang..aku demam..then aku kene masuk 800m kot..tapi time pertandingan tu aku kat dalam toilet ngan aimi..muntah!..sediy gile, teringat kat skola lame time aku masuk 600m dulu…sob3.

then aku jadik prefect..cam biasa la hidup aku ni asek2 prefect je tapi kat skola ni aku tak berminat sangat sebab bukannya ade cabaran..budak2 pon baik je…paling lawak bile budak2 bangi kate diorang dulu prefect takyah organize perhimpunan,atau majlis2 rasmi..teringat lagi zaman dulu2 time assembly..aku paling suke part pa system argh..hehe..tapi berat gile pa system selalu vijay ngan eka je angkat..aku men cucuk2..testing123..pastuh time form3 aku kene jaga file merit budak2 form5..argh,sume form5 aku kene jaga…susah2 gak..tapi oleh sebab itu, aku kenal ramai antara senior aku yg walaupon kepala mereng tapi banyak thoughts diorang yg aku pikir mmg bagus utk digunakan.

then aku jadi prefect lepas ujian2 bangang yg aku tak nampak pon rasional dia tuh..pastuh ade lagi interview utk majlis tertinggi..aku kate kat madam faridah aku tanakla jawatan2 besar tuh since aku pon tak cukup selesa ngan persekitaran skola tuh..tapi aku dapat jugak setiausaha..aku ni bukannye pekerja, oleh sebab itu banyakla kerja2 prefect tertangguh. sian aidil.

1st task persaraan pn aminah..form5 sume suruh buat bagus2 cam diorang buat utk hari guru(bende yg paling diorang banggekan)..dalam hati aku cakap "eleh, poio je..bukan best sangat..last hari guru aku time form3 kitorang sewa satu studio punye equipment utk buat live band performance…ko ape tau" hahahah..tapi buat jugak..aku ngan aswad jadi emcee…suara tak dengar..nak je aku santau satu dewan..time tu mmg banyak kerja aku ngan aswad..pastuh adela gossip2 bangang timbul..then lepas abis upacara tuh, aku dapat lak resit bunga dari kp suruh mintak duit prefect cover kos bunga tuh…aku simpan lagi resit tu tapi aku biar je..tak kutip pon..yg nak beli aidil ngan sheera..biarla diorang je settlekan..hahahaha..lagipon mae ade cakap kat aku "membazir je..mak aku tuh cekgu, dia kalau dapat bunga pon buang je bila dah layu". raja tanya aku "lawa ke tak"..aku cakap tak berbaloi..jadi pemimpin jgnla kikis harta rakyat,yer. wahahaha.

masuk bab ponteng memonteng..banyak kali gak..aku tido dalam dorm. time preparation day utk hari terbuka asrama aku dok dalam dorm ngan faridah settlekan kitorang nye bintang2 dan utk mengelakkan kene tangkap, kitorang nyorok bawah katil kak imah..kenapa katil kak imah?? yer..soalan yg baik..jawapan: kak imah sidai baju kurung ngan jubah2 dia sampai tak nampak langsung kaki katil..wahaha..pastuh time diorang dah naik,aku ngan faridah sergah diorang..mmg tahan gelak je time bawah katil tuh..setan punye budak2 dorm ngumpat kitorang tak tolong..hahahhaa..

then ade satu hari ni lepas re-orientation form4, balek tu ade ceramah ape erk? aku dah lupe..sebab aku tak pegi..aku,aimi,fatin,sayha,faridah lepak kat bilik bace aras makmur..sume bantai shorts time tuh..keskeskes..kitorang pon borak2,lepak2,gelak2(kene cover sket takut kantoi)..then bila kitorang dengar grill dah kene bukak, kitorang pindah makmur 5..tepat2 time sheera depan dorm, kitorang on lampu dorm..dia pon terkejut la..hahahah..

lepas seminggu buli sheera ngan perkataan. dia pon da tak tahan kot. kitorang kene panggil pn fauziah. small matter. dah settle pon. dia siap tuduh aku bawak henpon lagi. tak bla. aku mengaku sume kesalahan kecuali pasal henpon tuh. tak buat tak mengakula. aku skema la,mane ade bawak phone cam korang! :p time pengarah sbp datang wat round pon aku ponteng gak..tempat rahsia..heheh..

kat integomb aku selalu demam..kekadang pura2 demam pon ade..tapi kalau ramai org demam..sure aku demam sekali.x cukop vitamin la nih. aimi la paling baik ngan aku..ingat time dia amik air dari water cooler utk tuam aku. pastuh bawakkan aku ubat..sob3..mane korang nak carik member camtu??

petang2 aku selalu gi jogging ngan member aku la sape lagi kalo tak aimi,fatin,ngan sayha..time mula2 masuk skola dulu aku selalu men volleyball ngan budak2 form2..tapi diorang kerek..tak best..bila aku masuk kelas lepas main (padang ngan kelas dekat je..otw g kelas leh arr ushar aspura, diorang ni pemalas tukar bedsheet), sure diorang tanye "ei aki,ko g mane haa..sampai berpeluh2.." aku pon katela ngan accent yg pekat.."riadhoh la..kate time riadah takkan nak bace buku kot"hahaha..sian howra ngan nina..

assembly=aku penah tertido sambil berdiri..sungguh memalukan..nama aku pon ade 3 kali kene sebut kat perhimpunan.1st time pelantikan prefect, 2nd sebab pakai inai, 3rd sebab tak buat public speaking..ahahhaha..moooomaaalaaa..then, lepas buat public speaking dia puji2 aku..haha,kasi line aku bangge sket "hey,u was very good…where did u get the idea to do that??..but anyway u’re really good..nice job girl..nice job"..hahaha..then aku dapat hadiah harry potter nye novel..owh,maknenye 4 kali la kene sebut kat assembly..time tu aku blur je sebab aku tak tau pon tuh pertandingan (adeke org diwajibkan masuk petandingan???)

dahla tuh, cukupla sampai sini je…btw, cekgu saedah selalu sebut2 pasal org yg tak kenal dia tuh..budak tu adalah aku ngan ***.hahahaha..mati kau lah, bajet famez..bukan penah berduet ngan siti nurhaliza ke, strumming ngan oag ke..banyak belagak pulak..tahun ni walaupon paling panjang aku rase, tapi paling sket aku dapat lessons of life…hidup aku pon tak dapat melihat dunia luar..aku dah lost aku nye sense of humour, respect kat org lain dan banyak lagi good quality yg dah fade..aku pon dah tak dapat menulis dgn baik cam dulu2..even time bahas pon aku selalu sangkut..ntah apela jadik kat aku…tapi aku dapat rase otak aku makin lampi dan beku..hahahah..takpela..taun depan ade lagi kan??

aku amik kesempatan ni nak ucapkan time kasih banyak2 kat sume org..aimi sebab jadi kawan aku yg paling baik, sebab jeleskan aku time ko rapat ngan seha..mae sebab jadi first kawan aku kat integombodo tuh…husna ngan fatin yg selalu teman aku pedajal org..sayha yg buat hati aku kecewa time ko rapat ngan aimi..hahahaha..cekgu2 yg mengajar..dan tak kurang juga yg menyusahkan idup aku dengan hwerk2 yg mmg aku takkan buat..terutama sekali pn rabiatul yg tak perasan aku tak hantar semua folio bi..aidil sebab tahan je ngan perangai aku dan still member ngan aku walaupon kene gosip kuat dulu2..raja sebab nasihat aku,aimi,fatin..sheera sebab sediakan kasut utk dibuang dalam tong sampah surau(wahahahaha)..banyaknyer..aku kate nak stop tadi..aku ni penipu ke hape nih..dah arghh..bye!

tired. homwerk sux. since aku tak abiskan lagi folio kimia:bahan buatan dalam industri, aku kenala work extra utk cuti nih..yeah,padan muke aku..

i scare myself easily lately..the shadow of my hand from my lamp made it look like a cat ran across my floor…and i do not own one! i scream like hell that time..hahaha..one more thing, there’s one emoticon that’ll surely scare me.. raja’s favourite. dammit. i’ve seen the real one twice..maybe thrice but the last time it wasn’t really clear. come on, let’s go hunting so i won’t be so bloody coward.

so, when i couldn’t push myself to anymore homwerk thingy..i update this thing

What’s so good: family. talking for hours with my fav pal. im . digital photography. artwork. drawing. my own guitar. xbox. making sandcastle.  my own schedule. coffee. lots of comics. fast computer. fishballs. my music. aimi. husna. faridah. fatin. raja. jon! my bro(sumtimes), daniel, spongebob. imagination. retarded birds(chicken,flamingo n ducks..as long as it doesnt fly) , cats!! , latenight movies. hoodies. carwash machine. live football match(watching not playing..haha) , hairwax, earwax euww..haha . enormous headphone. barley. letter from a friend not pn. durasni. massages. big hug. yong tow foo. camping. suprising people. making wishes when its 11:11 or 12:34 like when i was 4. a lot more i don’t remember…

What’s no good: liars. drama mamas. cigarettes. rain sometimes.traffic light. ungratefulness. cockiness. the cost of living on long island. loneliness. rapists. racists. heterosexists. sexists. gas prices. neighbours (mase diorang tgh karaoke). alarm clock. plain hot water. homwerk.

1. Who are you?

2. Are we friends?

3. When and how did we meet?

4. Do you have a crush on me?

5. Would you kiss me?

6. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.

7. Describe me in one word.

8. What was your first impression?

9. Do you still think that way about me now?

10. What reminds you of me?

11. If you could give me anything what would it be?

12. How well do you know me?

13. When’s the last time you saw me?

14. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn’t?

15. Are you going to put this on your blog and see what I say about you?

____________________________________________________________________

well, this one is longer..even more question..but if u do drop in to my blog accidentally just do it…plz plz..yeah now i started to beg like a dog.

Whatever, this will be a good ego-shot..hahha

1. Who are you?

2. Are we friends?

3. When and how did we meet?

4. How have I affected you?

5. What do you think of me?

6. What’s the fondest memory you have of me?

7. How long do you think we will be friends?

8. Do you love me?

9. Do you have a crush on me?

10. Would you kiss me?

11. Would you hug me?

12. Physically, what stands out?

13. Emotionally, what stands out?

14. Do you wish I was cooler?

15. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I?

16. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.

17. Am I loveable?

18. How long have you known me?

19. Describe me in one word.

20. What was your first impression?

21. Do you still think that way about me now?

22. What do you think my weakness is?

24. Do you know what makes me happy?

25. Do you know what makes me sad?

26. What reminds you of me?

27. If you could give me anything what would it be?

28. How well do you know me?

29. When’s the last time you saw me?

30. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn’t?

31. Do you think I could kill someone?

32. Have we ever kissed?

33. Do you miss me?

34. Do you think i miss you?

33. Are you going to put this on your blog and see what I say about you?